My history with nature..

(This post was inspired by Zach Bush)

My relationship with nature has always been this adventurous, yet maternal feeling. Growing up, I was constantly outside playing with my neighbors catching moths, digging in dirt, kicking balls on grass, riding my bike- pretending like I am going to the grocery store. I always played sports as well, which I think played into this relationship. In high school, I was a waterpolo player, and really loved the Ocean and being in the water. It was such a release for me especially during this time in my life which was really hard. The water was something that I knew I could let it all out in everyday, and then come out an hour later feeling cleansed and new.

Then when I was 20, I lived with my Aunt in Switzerland for 3 months. I think this time was a whole new lesson in nature, I saw a whole new side of it. The nature here is just so strong, it kinda hits you in the face and makes you stop and bask in all it’s glory. There’s moments where I am just “Wow, how is this real!“ .. Also not to mention, learning and feeling the element of woods and forest- it can actually scare me sometimes it feels so strong!! My Swiss roots have taught me SO much about the magic that nature holds and offers. I’ve always said, there is a lot of indigenous intelligence running through the roots of Switzerland, as well as in my family. For example, my Aunt rosali, who is approaching her 99th year, knows everything there is to know about roses. Where to trim them down (after the 3 leaves). That you can never repot a rose bush in the same spot. And just that every time they grow, they bring some new mystery and beauty with them that you just cant help but try to figure out…

Then in 2018, I started to really feeeeel nature for the first time. I dont know what and where this came from, but during this time I started walking outside ALL of the time. I would walk maybe 5-7 days a week, after work mostly, along the beach in Long Beach. I loved this time alone and being by myself outside. Sometimes I would walk to work, which was a good hour walk there and back.. I would put my headphones in, watch beautiful sunsets, and my mind was in such a calm, yet stimulated place. A lot of my healing and ideas came from this time…

My relationship with nature currently is in such a deeper place. I have plants that I talk to sometimes (lol I dont know if this is normal, but I feel like they’re my friends 😂), I need to go outside at least once a day in the fresh Swiss air and take my deep breathes- its truly medicinal. I get excited to notice new things and colors and textures on my walks. and I just feel so much sadness thinking about how she’s struggling now and endlessly still gives.. My relationship with her has taken on emotions now, which in my mind is kinda weird, but in my heart I truly feel it.

I see a lot of similar traits between Females and Nature. The beauty to begin with, the act of always giving and never asking anything in return (for all the mommas out there), the grace, the healing nature offers, the intelligence of her system, and the change & transformation she’s going through. I wish all can experience the depth of what I am talking about, it truly has held me together and given me SO much courage. I know she always has my back..

Childhood Reminders 💕

We are on the way to Milan today, and I just found out that a radio legend from Los Angeles passed, his name was Art Laboe. RIP 🕊 I really feel like this is the end of an era with his passing and my childhood growing up with oldies, lowriders and happy, simple times 💔 I had a really unique childhood. As I am currently realizing that it was filled with quite a bit of trauma, there was a lot of very cool, valuable and beyond special parts of it! Growing into a family of music and entertainment self made entrepreneurs made originality and business exciting!! It was also always a good time, which I think had a negative side too, but it also kept the ball rolling which was a positive. My dad took me to concerts where his artist would play, and I got to go to Wango Tango like every year. I was around music legends that were following their passions and love for music, but also dealing with the business side. It was expansive and I learned so much being around different cultures, people, types of music, etc. I feel like these lessons set me up for the big world of fashion and being able to work in an environment handling different types of people and coming together for the purpose of making something into reality. It scares me seeing all of this overly sensitivity these days… I feel its tuning out and canceling important matters of Life, reality and truth, authenticity, and turning everything into one way. This is no bueno. We need to stop running to canceling and extreme sensitivity and also learn to embrace different realities, take responsibility, and learn how to cope!! Theres so much beauty in the differences and owning who you are.

These were the beautiful parts of my childhood, even through all the lessons and trauma. I feel really lucky when I reminisce on this side. I am really lucky for the things I have gotten to experience and the knowledge I have gained from it! What are some of your best childhood memories? I would love to know!

La Musica 🎶

I recently watched this podcast of Dj Real Black Coffee talk about his music, and how he uses it as a healing outlet for himself and his fans. Im very intrigued at all the new avenues that are available for healing these days and music is a huge, everyday one for me, so I figured I would write a post sharing my appreciation to my life long connection with music. Also my family history with music Is just so dang cool..

My grandpa on my dads side, Arthur Walker, was born and raised in Liverpool, UK. Now for starters, Liverpool is where record shops were first created, also where the Beatles grew up, and a great deal of amazing musicians and music came and still come out of this magical city, that I have YET to visit… My grandpa migrated West when he was in his 20s to pursue bigger dreams and explore more of this big, yet tiny world. He first landed in Ontario, Canada where he met my Grandma; they quickly relocated to Los Angeles to become famous movie stars.. Theres a lot to my grandpas history that I still have yet to put together and get more information about because he died when I was 1. I really wish I got to meet him and ask him sooo many questions, sometimes on my days of struggling here (in this new country and move), ill strike up a convo with him and just say hey. I find it so interesting that I am kinda set out on a similar journey than his, yet just the opposite direction ❤️ and in a way I feel his presence and connection at times when I reach out…

After landing in California, my grandma opened up her own record shop called Norwalk Records and my grandpa quickly started his own record label and had a warehouse in Fresno, California. He would work swap meets and was a bonafide hustler/ MC for local radio stations. Working in the music scene up in Northern California, my grandpa came across a fresh new Mexican Mariachi band, and soon helped found the band, Los Tigres Del Norte- one of the most tradional, authentic Mexican bands to this day. If you ask any hispanic person if they know Los Tigres, they would literally ask you “Eres tu loco??” bc this band is rooted in Mexican culture. Los Tigres used their music to speak about the hardships of being a Mexican immigrant in America, drug trade, family, and life back then. They really had this deep musical connection with their fans, it was a moment in Mexican history. The fact that my grandpa saw this them from the very beginning kinda blows my mind. I feel like he saw real musical talent in a genre so outside of what he was aware of, and I just think that is SO cool..

Music is and will always been one of the biggest outlets for me.. It’s gotten me through some pretty tough times, opened my mind up, brought feeling and creativity, taught me more about myself, connected me with people, and even talks/ guides me at times. That last one probably sounds a bit crazy to some, but I swear some of the songs/lyrics that come on my shuffle really connect deeply in the moment. I feel so lucky to have this appreciation for such a powerful tool, and will always cherish this gift passed down to me..

What’s some of your favorite music? Genres? Artists? Tell me in the comments, I always love music recs :)

Empathy & Magic

Idk maybe its because I am transitioning to another country/culture, but i’m seeing how mentally flexible we are as humans, and it makes me feel more connected to this world. I feel tremendous feelings when I listen and watch on the news that humans of other cultures are going through world history trauma. Do you too? A part of me feels like maybe i’m feeling too much ? But I think that’s what society wants us to think. It’s scary! The depth that is. Especially when everyone is so disconnected and has perfected numbing themselves. I feel like the odd one out and now the “brave” one when it just feels like the normal ((yet extremely difficult)) thing to do.

I think we have to come to terms that our “fears” are in a certain way, just a distraction. We can overcome the trauma and fears now. It is here! This opportunity has came! Be grateful bc its huge.

Have you noticed the amount of healing taking place? This new concept is spreading like wildfireee. The concept is happening mentally, physically, and spiritually around the world- to humans in places of poverty to humans that are from well respected backgrounds, and everyone in between. We are finding out so much more information, and ways to heal deeper on all 3 levels. It’s a new world the level of health we can achieve now. I believe there is no coincidence to this. I believe that this is happening because of this global shift that has occurred recently. I’ve seen it in beauty- with peoples glow ups and the “new, healthy version” resonating physically that they look like a new personl! i’ve seen it in babies, and how they are way more advanced from an earlier age. and i’ve experienced it during a very special time myself, but thats for another post ;)

All I ask is… take a moment everyday for the next 30 days to stop & look within. You deserve true health too, and the ability to move past the daily pains you carry/ have been carrying. Dont be afraid either, the world of possibilities has arrived and ain’t leaving, its just gonna spread like wildfire ❤️

In the comments below, let me know if I’m crazy or you too have gone through a change or shift lately?

Travel Wisdom

I had this little piece saved from a note that I wrote coming back from a trip with my boyfriend from Puglia (where he is from). Puglia blew my mind & flying always makes my mind so free and run wild! I dont know if its something in the clouds, or just being so high up, but wowzers I am in dreamland sometimes. I even remember the first time flying to Europe and Dont Panic by Coldplay came on my iPod while crossing the Atlantic. it was such a moment for me at 16, exploring the big world for the first time :) Pure magic ✨ ooh the nostalgia…

the more I travel, the more I realize that there are laws bigger than the ones that affect our daily life. There are laws that govern the laws that we have now. Laws that take up much more impact and meaning than the ones that shall I say are “man made”? these laws are the laws of the universe- they’re deeply ingraved in humanity. For example, within these universal laws, i have learned that the universe seriously always supports me. Simple as that. When i fully trust with love, it comes back protected and ten fold. From buying one way tickets and throwing myself out into the universe/ to not having an agenda & having my trips unfold into experiences that I can’t even explain/ to meeting people who are completely different from me, but always finding something to connect with / to people I barely know offering me a comfy place to stay when I didn’t have a plan/ to facing fears like being brave enough to walk through a new city alone just to get back to my hotel room. Growing up in OC and having all 4 of my grandparents come from different countries, it made me feel more like second generation than American, even though I was born there. My mom raised me with an openness to culture and the world & always taught me that the world is something to explore and not to be afraid of (another universal law :))) which I will forever pass along.. and for the people who still can’t wrap their heads around these ideas that aren’t tangible or able to see, I ask you to book a ticket and trust..

P.S. one thing that traveling has taught me, is that how is it that every culture has its own rules and traditions, and they are soooo different! Like especially in Europe where all theres so many countries put together… Coming from the US, it really made me think about the systems of the world and if there is truly one Real system..

How do you feel about the idea of a Universal Law within our collective? What governs you? Do you follow more of your own intuition, or maybe your culture, or a system? Would love to hear all about your experience on this in the comments below!

those late night thoughts...

Does life ever feel like a game to you? One lesson after the other, trying to get stronger and better at life but there is always something to learn or get through. Sometimes it test you on anotha level, like when it rains it pours.

And then surprisingly, like you didn’t believe you would ever get through it, you get through it! phew.. how did I ever get through that? and then the next lesson comes and your like i don’t think i can get through this one but i do remember getting through that one time that I never thought i could…

Makes me ask what is the point of life? Why does everyone assume life is supposed to be peachy-keen and happy all the time when it literally isn’t.

I like to live and live in feeling everything that comes my way. I think theres something more than the pains of life! I think there is a beauty of getting through it and evolving! We are so strong when it comes down to our core, we have everything we ever needed inside of us! <3

P.S. Thank you Bon Iver for the motivation behind this post.